Dylan Connell

Dylan Connell, also known as Clarence "Squid" Funbags, is a CAW superstar signed to the Raw Brand of New-WWE as well as the Jeri-MAX CAW League. He is also a SMF forum member who is constantly picked on and accused of being a Ben 10 fan.

New-WWE E-Fed
Shortly after joining the SMF Forum, Dylan Connell was introduced into the New-WWE roster under the Raw brand. After a very short time, he was pushed into the main event, eventually winning the World Heavyweight Championship in a shocking upset over Pablo Alfonzo Gonzales.

His reign was short lived, and he lost it on his first defense in a scramble match to Danny Jackpot. Dylan soon got the gold back (which was now held by Smfowns4 following an attack on Danny that injured him). After losing the World Heavyweight Championship again, Dylan vanished.

He re-emerged months later as part of the Smackdown brand. On his re-debut match, he defeated then-champion Miley Cyrus to win the WWE Championship for the first time in his career. The e-fed closed with Dylan as the WWE Champion.

New-WWE Smackdown
Dylan was not present when the CAW adaptation of New-WWE started, and the WWE Championship was vacated due to title history being wiped. Dylan would make no appearances until Summerslam, where he appeared as Mercurius' mystery partner in a match for the vacant WWE Tag Team Championship. The duo defeated Rey Mysterio and Jeff Hardy to win the gold.

Both Dylan and Mercurius set their sights on the United States Championship, which Mercurius had lost a few shows before Summerslam to Javori Smart. They ended up competing against eachother in a triple threat match also featuring Javori for the US Championship, but Javori was able to retain. On the first Smackdown before Unforgiven, the pair lost the WWE Tag Team Championship to The Miz and John Morrison. The fed shut down a few shows (and a CPV) later.

When New-WWE re-opened, Mercurius won a Battle Royal for a title shot of his choice. Off-screen, Mercurius and Dylan had agreed that if Merc won, he'd choose a shot at the now Unified Tag Team Titles. However, Merc changed his plans upon meeting Maryse, who seduced him into choosing a Divas Championship match for her. A furious Dylan then challenged Mercurius to a match at Armageddon. Despite Connell's best efforts, Mercurius was victorious.

Dylan didn't do much for the next couple of weeks aside from competing in the Royal Rumble Match, which he lost. On the show after No Way Out, Dylan was traded to the Raw brand.

Hardcore Champion
Dylan made his Raw debut (with a brand new look) in a match against fellow trade member Dorf Liggleton in a losing effort. He would lose match after match in a string of bad luck, that was finally broken on an edition of Superstars, where he defeated then-champion Jason Hawkinz, Ryan ReX, and El Jefe to capture the Hardcore Championship. However, Dylan ended up losing on his first defense to El Jefe in a controversial way; Dylan made Jefe bleed in their First Blood Match, but little did Dylan know that it was under Cuban First Blood rules, meaning the first Cuban to bleed wins.

A pissed off Dylan refused to admit defeat, and introduced a new Hardcore Championship, and claimed to still be the real champion. This lead to a rematch between Dylan and El Jefe in the pre-show of WrestleMania IV in a Fidel Castro Tables Match. Although Dylan gave it his all, he once again fell to the Big Nasty Bastard and was DDT'd through a table. After beating Mr. Mac on the Season 2 opener of Raw, Dylan would lose his spot on the roster when El Jefe defeated him in a Cuban Raft Cage

Return
Dylan's exile from New-WWE was extremely short lived. On the first show since Dylan was fired, Nic of WWE-Kids (who was set to compete for the Intercontinental Championship that night) announced he was giving his spot on the roster up in order to allow Dylan to return. Dylan emerged with a new look, and battled Christian for the championship. Despite the initial shock of Dylan's return and makeover, Christian was able to thwart Dylan's efforts and retain the Intercontinental Title.

Dylan competed against Christian, El Jefe, and Lil Ham at Backlash for the Intercontinental Championship in a Fatal Four Way Elimination Match, and was the first man eliminated. Dylan was defeated in that match by El Jefe, who utilized one of Dylan's own finishers against him. Later, on Superstars, Dylan once again battled his nemesis in match for the Hardcore Championship, where if Dylan lost, he'd be banned from competing for the Hardcore Title. Dylan ended up losing to Jefe in under 15 seconds following a devastating savate kick.

The following Raw, Dylan received yet another gimmick change, this time essentially being a walking billboard for Mr. Sprigg's BBQ, a small restaurant. He entered the Raw King of the Ring 2010 tournament, but lost in round one to Christian.

The Ninth Clique
After enduring week after week of torture and humilation at the hands of El Jefe and The Miz, Dylan Connell once again went under a transformation and took on the look of an amateur wrestler. On the February 1st edition of Superstars; Dylan was set to compete against nemesis El Jefe in a singles match. Dylan refused to compete against Jefe one-on-one, and brought out Cawsplash and Matt Metamorphis (both making their debuts). The three defeated El Jefe in a 3-on-1 handicap match, following a massive powerbomb by Cawsplash. Interestingly, instead of going for the pin himself, Cawsplash tagged in Dylan and allowed him to score the pinfall over his rival.

MONSTER HEEL
Dylan was one of the original e-fed Jeri-MAX superstars to return when it became a CAW League. In his first official match, a tag team match for the vacant Jeri-MAX Tag Team Championships on WARP, Dylan and his best friend Kevin 11 of Ben 10 were defeated by Jurt Angle and one of his guttersluts. On the next episode, VORTEX, Dylan was given a shot at Dorf Liggleton's World Heavyweight Championship, but was easily beaten.

The Genie's Boy
On the December 30th WebMatch, Dylan managed to defeat the returning Aladdin Hassan in 8 seconds with a little help from Aladdin's Genie. Afterwards, the Genie revealed that he's leaving Aladdin's side and has given Dylan his Genie powers for the time being. Since gaining his powers, Dylan has defeated his old mentor and friend Kevin 11, as well as picking up an upset victory over Triple H despite receiving 3 Pedigrees. Dylan defeated Grover FUCKING Cleveland for the Jeri-MAX European Championship at the Black Hole CPV, but because he used his powers for a 3rd time, he lost them and escaped the arena in his boxer shorts.

Back to Normal / Bald
Dylan Connell's first match without powers was a triple threat match against Sheamus and the Big Boss Man on Episode 7. Dylan avoided as much physical contact as he could, sacrificing a win that would grant him the choice of his Ooze opponent by staying on the outside of the ring for the entire match. Sheamus would go on to win the match and at the time would be scheduled to face Dylan for the Jeri-MAX European Championship at Jeri-MAX Ooze. On Episode 8 Dylan was crushed by DreCon the Giant in a Steel Cage Match, receiving multiple Giant Chokeslams. On Episode 9, Dylan would lose his hair after being beaten by Brutus the Barber Beefacke in a "Hair vs. Hair" Match. On Episode 10, Dylan lost a bloody brawl with his rival El Jefe, who would wind up winning Dylan's European Championship. Sheamus would then win the European Title from Jefe not much later, so Dylan and Sheamus' match at Ooze would be rebooked, but the roles of Champion an Challenger would be reversed. Sheamus would go on to destroy Dylan at Ooze, successfully retaing his European Championship

On episode 11, Dylan convinced Evan Redcourne not to quit Jeri-MAX after losing to random jobber Winter Bradleys, explaining that he's lost many times before but has never quit. Evan soon realized that if he quit, he'd look worse than Dylan, so the high-flying Native American decided to stay and challenge Winter to a rematch. After Evan lost said rematch, Dylan promised him that HE will defeat Winter Bradleys at The All-American American Bash, and when he does, the Hardcore Championship would be awarded to Evan.

GWEF
Dylan Connell made his GWEF debut by defeating Jobby Jobber with the Twist of Secrets in his first GWEF match.

DCWL
Dylan Connell made his DCWL debut by losing to Coca Cola at LOLRANODM 2. He won the DCWL LULZ championship in his next match by defeating Scott McShannon in a match where if Scott lost, he would get shaved bald, and if Dylan lost he would have to date Machojef, Dylan overcame the odds and defeated McShannon, Scott would then have his...and pubes shaved by Brutus. After the match, Suspect would leave the mark of a nigger and burn Dylan with The Fire Lariat. The burns on Dylan are so bad that his skin colour has went completely black.

Championships and Accomplishments

 * New-WWE
 * 1x WWE Championship (E-Fed version of New-WWE, not officially recognized)
 * 3x World Heavyweight Championship (E-Fed version of New-WWE, not officially recognized)
 * 1x WWE Tag Team Championship (with Frederick James Francis)
 * 1x Hardcore Championship
 * 1x Fake Hardcore Champion


 * Jeri-MAX
 * 1x Jeri-MAX European Championship
 * 1x Jeri-MAX WARP Team Championship (w/Ben 10 & TNC Joshua) (Inaugural, E-Fed)


 * DCWL
 * 1x DCWL LULZ Champion

Finishing and Signature Moves

 * Electric Chair Facebustter
 * Twist of Secrets (Snap Twist of Fate)
 * Twist of Fate (used in Jeri-MAX)
 * Dutch Death Drop (Pumphandle into a oklahoma lift spun out into a Over The Shoulder DDT)
 * Back Alley Driver (Oklahoma Lift into a Running Elevated Inverted DDT)
 * Ireland Driver (Pumphandle Gutwrench Driver)
 * Dutch Drop (Modified Front Powerslam)
 * Diving Sick Kick (Diving Karate Kick)
 * Ben 10 Cutter (used as TNC) (Neckbreaker with Theatrics)
 * Nigger Squasher (used as TNC) (Oklahoma Gutbuster into a Leg Hook Inverted Suplex lifted into a Sitout Wheelbarrow Facebuster)

Entrance Themes

 * Mr. Sprigg's BBQ Jingle (New-WWE, Jeri-MAX, & DCWL)
 * "Genie in a Bottle" by Christina Aguilera
 * "Kill It" by Fight
 * "Mastadon" (w/L.O.D. Intro) by Jim Johnston
 * "Born to the Fight" by Waylander (Old New-WWE & GWEF Currently)
 * "Gangsta Lane" by Jim Johnston
 * "What's Up?" by R-Truth
 * "Ben 10 Alien Force Theme"