Art Fistmouth

"I don't give a fuck man, I am Art."

Art Fistmouth is a DCO superstar who was killed by Detective John Kimble but came back from the dead at DCO Presents a Big Strong Motherfucker.

FNW
Art Fistmouth's biggest storyline in FNW was when he stepped up against the alien tyrant and FNW World Champion Primo who had previousl assassinated president Obama. The angle would lead to a controversial match for the FNW World Championship, Primo defending his title against Fistmouth and Detective John Kimble. The winner would not only be champion, but the new President of the United States.

Unfortunately due to a disagreement with BurbMEERKAT, Fistmouth along with Gaylord Queerstreet, his brother Rod, and Craven Moorehead would be removed from the FNW roster. Fistmouth's position in the match with Primo would be replaced with Al Gore.

The match would not be released until many years later, as the "alien Primo" gimmick would be banned from mention in the Something CAWful forums.

As a result of the removal of Fistmouth from the FNW roster, and forced main event push of Detective John Kimble, a stable known as the "Sons of Liberty" (Biff Andreas, Shawn Dynasty, and Tyler King) would attack Kimble after a match.

DCO
Art Fistmouth would primarily spend the beginning of his career competing for the DCO World Championship. He would defeat champion David Hart Smith in a house show and subsequently lose his championship to Bella Swan at CAWllision 5 in a street fight. Fistmouth had the chance to redeem himself at the sixth CAWllision, when he competed in DCO World Championship Elimination Chamber Match against Bella (who was still champion at the time), Tyler Throwback, Mike Knox, DH Smith, and Bryce Kanyon. Art would make it to the very end of the match, but ultimately ended up suffering defeat at the hands of Bella once again.

Following his FNW departure, Fistmouth would form the Guns of the Patriots with Queerstreet and Moorehead (a stable created in direct response to FNW's Sons of Liberty faction). The group would become extremely dominant, taking control of the tag division with an iron fist and defeating teams such as Margaritaville and The Faculty. Fistmouth's stablemates Gaylord and Moorehead would win the inaugural DCO Tag Team Championships.

The group primarily feuded with Frank Garrett. Though Garrett defeated Fistmouth and Queerstreet in a Handicap Last Man Standing Match at DCO Not An Easy Kill, the Guns eventually got the last laugh at DCO In The Lonely Streets of Sapulpa, where Gaylord and Art avenged their loss and defeated Frank in a Handicap Ladder Match. The match included a stipulation that forced Garrett to join the group as a result. Fistmouth would team with his new Guns of the Patriots stablemate and win DCO Tag Team gold.

Things would take a turn for the worst when Fistmouth at DCO The Fourth Reich. Following a successful DCO Tag Title defense against The Faculty (Detective John Kimble and The Chaperone, Ray Bradstone), Fistmouth was ambushed in the boiler room by Kimble. After a brief pummeling, Kimble ripped one of the pipes off the wall and threw it like a javelin, piercing Fistmouth through the chest and impaling him against the boiler. After a few agonizing minutes of choking up blood, Art succumbed to his injuries and passed away. After his death, Fistmouth's son Osiris Fistmouth would join the roster and win the DCO Television Championship. Immediately afterwards, Osiris would cut a profanity laced promo and be fired by his father's killer.

Fortunately, Osiris' failure as the successor to the Fistmouth name would end up not mattering. Unbeknownst to the general public, Fistmouth's body was never laid to rest. Instead, the corpse was taken to Cyberdyne Systems by John Kimble. His brain was replaced with a neural net processor (a learning computer), and he was brought back to life as a cybernetic entity programmed with undying loyalty to Kimble and the DCO brand. After years of testing and operations, Fistmouth returned to DCO in 2017, winning a battle royal for the right to challenge Jeff Jarrett for the DCO World Championship. Though he was able to defeat The Son of a Bitch in his first singles match since returning, he was unable to recapture the DCO World Championship in his title match against Jeff Jarrett (narrowly losing to a backslide pin).

Finishers

 * Stalling Sidewalk Slam

Championships and Accomplishments
DCO CAWllision USDW
 * DCO World Championship (2 times)
 * DCO Tag Team Championship (1 time) - with Frank Garrett
 * DCO Television Championship (2 times)
 * Second DCO Triple Crown Champions - with Frank Garrett
 * Southern Heavyweight Championship (1 time)
 * USDW World Heavyweight Championship (1 time)